Soulmates and Spellbooks
by catsinthevoid
Summary: A young Anthony Crowley, with the help of his friend Anathema, uses a spell to identify who his soulmate will be.


"C'mon Anthony, we've got to at least try it!" Anathema begged as she pointed to the large, dusty tome in between them. It was a book of spells for witches and was open to a page about how to find your soulmate. "Aren't you even a little curious?"

Twelve year old Crowley sighed. "There's no way this stuff will actually work."

"Well," Anathema said, "If you really believe that then there's no harm in trying it. Worst case scenario, nothing happens. But if it does work then you get to meet your soulmate, the person you're destined to spend the rest of your life with." She splayed herself out onto the ground in front of the book, laying on her stomach as she read through the passage again. "It's worth a shot, don't you think?"

Crowley twiddled with his fingers, "It just seems like a waste of time, really."

Anathema looked him straight in the eye. "It's summer break, we've got nothing _but _time. What's the real reason?"

"Nothing! I just don't want to do it is all." He was pouting and he knew it. He ripped out a chunk of grass from Anathema's back lawn and threw it childishly.

"Crowley," she said sternly.

The boy sighed again petulantly. "Device."

"Fess up."

"What if," he began. "What if the spell _does _work? What if it works and I'm waiting to meet them and no one shows up. What if I don't have a soulmate? What if they died; children die sometimes too, y'know. Or what if I meet them and they don't like me. Mum says I'm a demon child and she wonders how she puts up with me sometimes...what if my soulmate thinks the same thing?"

"Your mum's just mean. Your soulmate will definitely like you; they have to, they're your soulmate. I think everyone has one, too, but just in case what if we do the spell for you first and if you don't have one then _I'll _be your soulmate, okay? Cuz friends stick together."

"Eww," Crowley laughed. "Don't soulmates have to kiss and stuff?"

Anathema ripped a dandelion from the ground and threw it at the boy's head. She scrunched up her face, "No way, not us. We'll be too busy doing fun things to do something as gross as swapping spit."

"Yeah, okay."

"Okay as in you'll do it?"

Crowley nodded, a small smile on his face as he crawled over to the other side of the book, next to Anathema. They sat together happily absorbed in the book and excited about the concepts of true love and magic. They reread the pages over and over again; if they were going to do this they wanted to do it right. The enchantment was meant to serve one purpose, to show them who their soulmate was; it wouldn't make them fall in love or tell them if everything would work out well, but it would let them know who their perfect match was. This was huge information and Crowley wondered if they were too young to know it. However, he desperately wanted to know if there was someone out there for him and, like Anathema had said, there was no harm in trying the spell out for themselves. There was a chance that their attempt would be fruitless, but there was also the possibility that it would _work_. The spell itself was very simple and the items needed to complete it were easily found around their homes, but the enchantment had to take place in the morning so they agreed to gather the supplies and meet again bright and early in the woods at their secret spot.

That night Crowley sat up in his bed, too full of nerves to sleep. He got onto his knees and he quietly called out to anyone, "It's me again. I'm worried about tomorrow, but don't let Anathema know. I really want a soulmate. I promise I'll be good, promise I'll try. I'll even stop yelling at Mrs. Dowling's marigolds, no matter how poorly they grow. So please give me a soulmate and please let them be nice. Maybe send me an angel! The nicest angel you have. And I promise I'll love them forever, so please let them like me too." With that out of the way he crawled back under the covers, falling asleep with dreams of what his perfect match might be like.

That morning he met up with Anathema under the broken tree by the river that they proclaimed to be "their spot". A large sheet over the tree transformed it into a tent and they often played make believe inside it during the summer. But today there would be no games. They had serious business to do.

"Do you think it will really work?" Crowley asked, trying to hold in his suspense.

"Of course! This is my great-grandmother's book and she was the best witch of all time" Anathema proudly proclaimed. "I'm going to be just like her and I'm going to find you your soulmate today, so please try not to look so constipated, okay?"

"Anathema! I don't look-"

"I know, I know, I'm just teasing, but really you don't have to be so nervous." She dug around in her bag and pulled out a bowl.

They set the bowl between them in the middle of the tent. Anathema poured the water from her thermos inside and Crowley added the rest of the ingredients. He spoke above the water, voice surprisingly steady. "Powers of water, earth, fire, and air bring me someone wonderful, gentle, and fair. My soulmate who is out there: come into my life, come into my soul, come to me today."

Anathema looked at him expectantly, "Do you feel any different?"

Crowley looked back at her, "Not really."

"Well, it'll take time. Just trust that your soulmate will find you and follow your instincts; all of the motions are in place." Then she added excitedly, "What do you think they'll be like?"  
"I have no idea," Crowley answered honestly. If he was being _completely_ honest, he was still a bit worried he wouldn't find anyone, despite Anathema's protests. Anathema had a way of knowing things, perhaps because of her occult background, and she was certain that he had a soulmate, but Crowley imagined she couldn't really know that someone was meant for him, no matter how much magic was in her blood.

"Haven't you thought about it?" she asked.

He hadn't, really. "I hope...I hope my soulmate is nice."

"Of course."

"And I hope they're a boy, like me."

"I hope mine's a boy too," Anathema said. "I hope he's tall and isn't scared of witches. I hope he listens to me and takes me seriously. What else?"

"I don't really know; that's it, I guess," Crowley finished lamely.

"That's it?" Anathema asked, surprised. "You just want your soulmate to be a nice guy?"

Crowley nodded. "And I want him to like me."

"Jeez, that's all? I have a whole list of what I'd like my perfect person to be like."

They went back and forth talking about soulmates until Anathema shooed him away, saying that he'd never meet his soulmate if he stayed hidden away in the tent all day. So, here Crowley was in the middle of the busy town square, not quite sure what to be doing. There were so many people walking this way and that he almost got dizzy. How was he supposed to find his soulmate, anyway? The spell wasn't very specific at this point. A group of elderly women shuffled past him on the street. Well, it certainly wouldn't be any of them. His soulmate would be around his age, or so he hoped. Where would children his age be spending the day, he wondered. The park seemed the most promising. He started making his way in that direction. He could see gaggles of kids, some his age, some older, some younger, running around the playground up ahead and he froze. He didn't think he was ready for this. He looked at his watch; it was only 11:13am. He had the entire day to meet his soulmate; it would be okay if he waited a little while and collected himself. All of his feelings and nervousness from yesterday were coming back and he felt like he could cry or throw up at any minute, maybe both. He wanted to go somewhere quiet. He spotted a library a block away and made his way inside.

The library was quiet and cool, the only sounds from inside coming from the air conditioning unit and the typing of the cranky looking librarian. From what he could see, no one else was in the building. He definitely wouldn't meet his soulmate in here. He walked slowly towards the back while trying hard to maintain his composure. There were four small reading rooms available for people to use. He quietly turned the knob on the first one and slipped inside. As soon as the door was shut he let the tears run down his face. He was supposed to meet his soulmate today, but he was too much of a coward to do it. If Anathema was in his place she would've marched right up to her soulmate and introduced herself, but Crowley couldn't do it. Crowley let out a sob. He should have faith, he knew it, but he was never good at blindly believing in anything. He asked too many questions and, completely unbidden, they were coming up again. What if he was messing up his one and only chance to meet his soulmate, what if he wasn't good enough to have a soulmate, what if, what if, what if…

He was interrupted from his mental tirade as a gentle voice called out to him. "Are you alright?"

Crowley opened his eyes, shocked. He hadn't realized there was another occupant in this room; he thought he had been alone in his thoughts. He quickly wiped his eyes and took a shuddering breath. "I-I'm fine." He turned around, hand already on the door knob when the voice called out again.

"Would you like to sit down?"

Crowley hesitated, then turned around. The owner of the voice was a boy, maybe fourteen years old. He had been sitting down in a pile of pillows that were set out for people to read on, but was quickly getting up. He was Crowley's height, maybe a little shorter, and slightly pudgy. He had fair skin, even fairer hair, and bright blue eyes. He was looking at Crowley with concern.

"I rented this room out for two hours, so no one will bother you." He gently put a hand on Crowley's shoulder and guided him to sit in the pillows. They were very soft and comfortable.

Crowley let out a sniffle and the boy handed him a handkerchief from his pocket. Crowley had thought only old people kept those, but he took it gratefully anyway. The other boy grabbed his things, preparing to leave, but Crowley stopped him.

"You can stay here, if you like. You did rent the room out, after all."

The older boy sat down next to him gingerly. "Okay," he said.

They sat in silence for a minute, Crowley focusing on evening out his breath and the blonde focusing on Crowley. He looked as if he was going to ask Crowley what was wrong so Crowley pointed towards the book that was laying on his lap. "What are you reading about?"

The boy lit up immediately, "Oh, it's lovely. It's a novel about an angel and a demon that have to avert the apocalypse."

"Sounds interesting."

"It is." The older boy smiled at him and Crowley thought that, when he got the courage to meet his soulmate, he hoped that they would have a nice smile too. "The library has another copy if you'd like to read it."

"That's alright," Crowley said. "I don't really like to read."

"Ah, that's too bad. But what are you doing in a library if you don't like books?"

Crowley shrugged, "I wanted to go somewhere quiet, collect my thoughts."

"And are they?"

"What?"

"Collected. Your thoughts."

"Not really." Crowley smiled, "Not at all, honestly."

"It might help if you talked about it, you know. No pressure, of course, but sometimes talking to a stranger can be very therapeutic."

Crowley sighed, giving in. "I'm supposed to meet my soulmate today, but I don't think I can face them."

"Your soulmate?" the boy asked, bewildered, "Aren't you a little young for that?"

"Maybe," Crowley admitted, "but if I don't meet them today there's a chance that I'll _never_ meet them."

The older boy smiled kindly, "I really doubt that. If this person is supposed to be your soulmate then you'll definitely meet again, when you're both ready."

"How do you know?"

"Well, I don't know, that's the thing. No one can really know when they'll meet their soulmate. I don't think it's something you can plan, so you shouldn't pressure yourself into something you're not ready for. I think that, when the time is right, you'll meet the person for you and it'll be completely unexpected. People smarter than me have said that you find love when you stop looking, so maybe you should focus on other things right now. Do things that make you happy and don't worry about finding "the one", just let them come to you when the time is right."

"Wow," Crowley said in awe, taking in the advice. He added 'being smart' to the list of traits he hoped his soulmate would have.

"I'm not sure if that helped, but that's what I think. Now, don't tell the librarian, but I always pack some chocolates with me when I come here." He pulled a box out of his satchel and smiled as he opened it. "Want to share some?"

"Thank you," Crowley said earnestly. 'Not just for the chocolate, but the advice too." He handed the handkerchief back to the other child; he was feeling much better now.

"Of course."

They sat next to each other, enjoying the chocolates together and talking about nothing and everything. They talked about their friends and family, their favorite movies, favorite foods, and so on. Crowley felt relaxed, thoughts of soulmates completely gone as he enjoyed the conversation. They talked until 1pm, when there was a knock on the door signalling that the two hours was up. Crowley tried not to be too disappointed, but the look on the other boy's face appeared to be rather downcast at the idea of leaving as well.

"It was nice to meet you," the boy said as he got up.

Crowley nodded. "Yeah, you too." He rubbed at his face, embarrassed. "My eyes don't look puffy do they? From before?" He didn't want to face the world with red eyes and tear stained cheeks.

The blonde observed him closely. "A little bit, yes," he answered honestly.

Crowley groaned, "Great."

"Here," the other boy said. He pulled a pair of sunglasses from his satchel and put them on Crowley's face. "No one will ever know."

"Won't you need these back?" Crowley asked, stunned.

"No. Besides, you look good in shades. You should keep them."

They made their way out of the cool library and into the summer heat. Just outside the library the other boy asked, "Are you going to find your soulmate now?"

Crowley smiled. "Nah, I think I'll wait 'til I'm a grownup. Let it happen naturally. Besides, someone wise told me love happens when you least expect is so…" Crowley shrugged, "better not go out looking."

The older boy smiled. "Right, well, I'm sure you'll meet them before you know it. It's probably best not to fuss."

"Yeah, you're right."

They said their goodbyes and went their separate ways. Anathema was waiting on his front porch when he got home.

"So," she said eagerly, "did you meet your soulmate?"

"Nope."

"No?" Anathema was surprised. She was sure the spell would work. "Anthony, what happened? Tell me all of the details!"

"I didn't look," Crowley answered.

"Didn't look? Why not?"

Crowley described the day in great detail. He talked about going to the town center, about the crowds of people, how he was going to go to the park but last minute went to the library instead. He talked about the reading room and the boy inside and what he had told him.

"Wait," Anathema said slowly, "isn't it possible that, well, couldn't it be…oh, Anthony, I don't know how to tell you this." She took a deep breath and said as gently as possible, "It sounds like you _did _meet your soulmate."

"What?" Crowley asked, thoroughly confused.

"The boy at the library," she explained.

"What? Him? No way," He thought about the events of the day again and a lightbulb went off in his head.

"He sounds like he was a very nice guy, at least, and that is what you wanted."

Crowley's world felt like it was spinning. "He-I...I didn't even get his name…all I've got to remember him are these sunglasses"

"We could find him together if you'd like. It can't be that hard."

"I-" Crowley began and then paused. "No, that's okay. If it's meant to be we'll meet again. I am glad I got to meet him today, though. I won't forget him, ever, and when I feel alone I'll just remember he's out there, somewhere. And one day, when we don't expect it, we're going to cross paths again, no spell books necessary."


End file.
